


you had to greet me with goodbye.

by m4kiroll



Series: femslash february 2021 prompts!! [5]
Category: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types, Super Dangan Ronpa 2
Genre: Angst, Bittersweet Ending, Canon Compliant, Canonical Character Death, Character Study, Developing Relationship, F/F, Femslash February, First Crush, Introspection, Missing Scene, Oblivious Sonia Nevermind, Sonia Nevermind Needs A Hug, Sonia-Centric, and chiaki's there to give it to her, and i'm too lazy to think of another so the overplayed song lyric stays, i just saw the prompt wave and thought of the lyric, i'm a sonia apologist sorry, light fluff, retelling of canon following sonia and soniaki basically, she doesn't realize her feelings until it's too late :(, the lyric for the title isn't relevant to the oneshot, the summary is so shitty but i'm too tired to word it differently, until she isn't and all there is is Pain
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-05
Updated: 2021-02-05
Packaged: 2021-03-17 15:41:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,133
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29227914
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/m4kiroll/pseuds/m4kiroll
Summary: watching chiaki wave with a serene smile on her face as she prepared for execution broke sonia’s heart.(or, sdr2 following sonia as she gets closer to the ultimate gamer.)
Relationships: Nanami Chiaki/Sonia Nevermind
Series: femslash february 2021 prompts!! [5]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2139279
Comments: 2
Kudos: 9





	you had to greet me with goodbye.

**Author's Note:**

> 7k words later and here we are. soniaki stans you guys are the sweetest human beings ever you guys deserve the 7k words/my blood, sweat, and tears that i spent doing this while simultaneously doing schoolwork
> 
> most of this is to my memory of sdr2 except the excerpts from ch5's trial are directly from the game
> 
> i didn't proofread this and i have no plans to because after this is posted i'm just going to take a nap because this was a pain in the ass to do while multi-tasking
> 
> **day five: wave**

Leaving her country for the first time in her life just to wind up on a foreign island with more than a dozen other unique individuals was bizarre, to say the least, but Sonia had been through weirder. 

At the very least, her classmates were pleasant! Each had a wonderful talent — well, besides one by the name of Hajime Hinata who seemed to have forgotten his talent, but Sonia was confident it was fascinating!

A photographer, a swordswoman, a gymnast, a musician… none of which she would ever have been given the opportunity to meet if she had stayed in Novoselic, trapped in the confinements of homeschooled learning at the palace — however, none intrigued her as much as the Ultimate Gamer had. 

The gamer had a look of pure concentration on her face when Sonia had walked in on her bent over a gaming console that was unfamiliar with her. 

Awkwardly clearing her throat, Sonia plasters a welcoming smile on her face, able to capture the attention of the girl. 

“Hello, my name is Sonia Nevermind; I am the Ultimate Princess! It is nice to meet you!”

“I’m Chiaki Nanami, the Ultimate Gamer,” the other murmurs quietly. “Video games are my hobby, and I’m a fan of all genres… nice to meet you.”

After leaving that interaction, Sonia couldn’t wipe the smile off of her face, and she wasn’t quite sure why. 

* * *

Everything had gone by in a blur — the killing game had been announced, Byakuya Togami had asserted himself as their leader, but now Byakuya Togami was laying underneath the table in a sea of his own blood. 

He had been murdered before their own eyes: and the one who had submitted to the killing game and stabbed the heir was in the very same room as her. Even worse, it had essentially happened before her eyes — it may have been completely dark, but surely she could have done something differently?

What good was a princess if she could not help to protect? 

Sonia stared off into space during the investigation, realizing all too late she hadn’t done anything until Monokuma had called the trial. She was so out of it that she hadn’t even noticed a certain gamer’s hand retract from her shoulder, walking off to the class trial.

* * *

The punishment was gruesome, that they were all in agreement with. Within seconds, Teruteru had departed the land of the living, having been reduced to a boiled alive innuendo of pig meat. 

The silence in the courtroom weighed heavily, as more than one person gripped their stomach as if they were to be sick. 

Sonia couldn’t bring herself to tear her eyes away from the remains of the Ultimate Cook.

(Or, Sonia couldn’t help but wonder, should she call him the Ultimate Chef? It had been his wish, as he had expressed to her and everyone else hours before his demise, to be referred to as such… 

It didn’t matter, she ended up deciding. He was dead, and wouldn’t return; he wasn’t even capable of having an opinion on the specifics of his Ultimate title — not anymore, at least.) 

* * *

How was a _game_ supposed to be a motive to kill, Sonia wondered? Admittedly, she was not the sharpest when it came to picking up on social cues or references, but even as a foreigner she didn’t see how the game Monokuma was so proud of could drive anyone to submit to bloodlust. 

His vague claims on what the game would do didn’t help, either. 

Helplessly, Sonia couldn’t help but look in the direction of Chiaki — she was the Ultimate Gamer, this was her expertise, was it not? 

However, that thought brought another concern to Sonia — what if Chiaki played the game and got tempted to kill? Would Sonia lose Chiaki as well? 

(And the rest of the group, as well! They’d also lose Chiaki, that’s what Sonia meant!) 

Resisting the urge to physically shake her head, Sonia brushes aside the thought. Chiaki would have no reason to kill anybody — she hadn’t been anything but helpful in the previous class trial, after all. She wasn’t going to doubt her friend over something as measly as a _video game._

With a new bounce in her step and a reassuring smile on her face, Sonia invited the girls for a beach party the next day, which most of them agreed to. She couldn’t help but smugly think that Monokuma’s efforts may have already taken two from the group, but with their unity, no more would be taken…!

* * *

It turned out, Sonia was wrong about a lot of things. 

She often mixed up common expressions. Sometimes, she confused past lingo with current slang, and at other times, she was just plain wrong on how to interact with her peers. 

One other thing she was wrong about? That there would be no more deaths. 

Even if the Body Discovery Announcement wasn’t enough proof of that, then the corpse of Mahiru Koizumi, the Ultimate Photographer, certainly did. The blood had begun to dry, but that didn’t take away from the crumpled up position of her bludgeoned body. 

This time, Sonia tried her best to be of help during the investigation. However, any joy she would have normally felt to see one of her classmates make a reference to a serial killer, Sparkling Justice, to be precise, was deflated immediately when she realized that either the serial killer was on the island and trying to frame one of her classmates, the serial killer _was_ one of her classmates, or that someone had just planted the mask there to throw everyone off. 

It was a shame her knowledge of serial killers only seemed to shine through _after_ death had transpired. 

* * *

Sonia couldn’t help but slightly envy Peko Pekoyama. 

Of course, she wasn’t jealous of her death — Sonia had a devoted country to rule, after all — but rather how she was willing to die, to _kill_ for an individual she loved. Sonia had an entire country that she loved dearly, but a person? Perhaps her mother or father could fit that category, but besides her advisor, knights and maids, she hadn’t ever interacted with anyone else, let alone had a friend. 

Let alone fall in love and be willing to kill and then die for that love. 

Maybe Sonia was insane for wanting to have what a murderer has (— _had_ ). Maybe she should have been thinking other things as she watched Peko Pekoyama be overwhelmed by the suffocation of the army, stabbing and clawing at her until she was an unrecognizable, bloodied corpse hovering near Fuyuhiko Kuzuryu’s own dejected body; regardless, it was where her heart had wondered too, and as soon as she noticed Kuzuryu twitching, she immediately abandoned her selfish thoughts.

She, and many others, rush to Kuzuryu’s side, trying to stop the blood flow desperately. As the ambulance, which had appeared out of thin air, drove off with Kuzuryu safely inside, the group collectively breathed out a sigh of relief; no more lives would be lost, they were sure of it. 

* * *

_Fool. Fool, fool, fool, fool, fool, fool…_

The word echoes in Sonia’s head as she stares up at the hanging body of Ibuki Mioda, mocking her for her false sense of security and hope she had held just nights prior. 

And that was all before she had realized the corpse of Hiyoko Saionji tied to the pillar in the music venue. 

* * *

After the third trial had ended, and Mikan Tsumiki’s execution had been executed, all Sonia felt was numbness. The execution was… strange, the only word Sonia could deem to fit it, and she wasn’t sure how much she could sympathize with the nurse after she had shown her bloodthirsty colors, killing twice only for the sake of killing — however, the deaths of the two victims had made her lips sealed shut, unsure if she could open them and bring herself to speak. 

Ibuki was delightful and always shared Sonia’s enthusiasm. The fact her state of unresponsive naivety was what chose Mikan to target her made Sonia’s heart ache, but not nearly as much as the second victim’s death. 

Had Sonia just offered to fetch the mirror for Hiyoko, she would still be alive. Maybe Sonia would have died, sure, and while it wouldn’t be the grand death she had envisioned she would have to benefit her country, it would still mean Hiyoko would be alive — besides, there were plenty of extended family members who would be more than happy to rule over Novoselic, Sonia was sure. 

Or, better yet, why hadn’t she just tied her kimono _for_ Hiyoko? Or taught her how to do so? That way, fewer lives would have been wasted on Mikan’s rampage for despair — or, while Sonia was at it, maybe _she_ should have offered to overlook the infected students, so that how Mikan would have never picked up the disease so that how she, Hiyoko _and_ Ibuki would still be alive —

“Sonia?” A voice asks, interrupting her thoughts.

At the mention of her name, Sonia discreetly and hurriedly wipes the single tear that had strayed from her eye, turning around to face her summoner. Chiaki’s worried, pale pink eyes stared back. 

“Are you… feeling okay?” Chiaki asks, pausing between her words. “You looked kind of…” 

“Down?” Sonia offers, laughing softly. “Well, I suppose you would be right. I am not one to often express how I am feeling, but it seems these recent deaths have broken that habit…”

“Do you want to talk about it?” Chiaki asks, sitting down next to Sonia. Sonia blinked, not having even acknowledged where her feet had brought her during her train of thought. The two were both lounging in the hotel lobby, the place they had met. That initial conversation felt like months ago to Sonia, when in reality perhaps a week had passed since then.

“That would be nice, thank you,” Sonia says, giving a soft smile. “You do not have to say anything — just listening is enough. And I’d appreciate it if this would stay between us…” 

“Of course,” Chiaki says, nodding. “Now, lay it on me. What’s on your mind?”

“Well, I can’t stop myself from thinking… thinking that if I had gotten Hiyoko the mirror, or tied her kimono for her, she’d still be here. Or, in fact, if I had taken Mikan’s place, she wouldn’t have ever contracted the Despair Disease —”

“But you might’ve,” Chiaki countered gently. “You probably would have, actually. And there’s no telling how it would affect you — maybe you’d also get the same disease as Mikan —”

“You mean the Remembering Disease?” Sonia inquiries, unable to stop herself from blurting the question out. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to interrupt, but my memory is intact — I remember everything from my life from my earliest memories to entering that classroom, and of course these past few days have been hard to forget… besides, I don’t believe anything in the past would have intensified my emotions to _that_ degree…” 

“You know what I meant,” Chiaki dismissed with a wave of her hand. “I just meant that if the disease affected you as bad as it did with Mikan, you’d be a terrifying killer, you know that?” 

Sonia chuckled faintly, though the conversation was far from amusing. “You say that as if you speak from experience,” she remarks dryly in a joking manner. 

“It’s not hard to piece together,” Chiaki insists, not laughing at the joke. “Sonia, your knowledge of serial killers really helped the second case. If you were under the influence of the Despair Disease, who knows what you could get away with with your knowledge? Especially if you could act normal as Mikan did…”

“I see,” Sonia admits, sighing heavily. “But still, Hiyoko’s death was preventable, was it not?”

“Well, yeah,” Chiaki says bluntly. “Of course if one of us was there in place of a victim, they wouldn’t have died. Of course if there were more people present right before someone was killed, no killings would happen. But you can’t beat yourself up about the hypothetical outcomes — you didn’t know you were sending Hiyoko to Mikan when she was in the middle of enacting her plan on Ibuki, did you?”

Sonia shook her head: _no_. Outside of class trials, she was unsure if Chiaki had ever spoken this much to her in just a few moments. 

“See? Sonia, no one blames you. We all carry the guilt and pain of our friends’ deaths, but we have to move forward, you know? Grow from their mistakes and honor their memory.”

Momentarily, Sonia was shocked with how much the speech had stirred something in her. Chiaki was right — she had to continue on and keep her head forward for Togami, who never wanted anyone to kill in the first place — she had to hold her tongue from unleashing all the curses at Monokuma for him, so they could live out the peaceful life he had envisioned. 

She and the others had to resist killing for the thing Hanamura reminded them of — their families, or country in Sonia’s case. While Teruteru had killed to reach his mother, along with putting a stop to Nagito’s plan, Sonia knew that she had to remain strong and as an example of a true leader — to not kill or die in this game would be a princess her country would be proud of, not one who robbed an innocent life to reach her people who were surely in good hands under her parents’ rule.

They had to live on to solve the mystery Mahiru, Ibuki, Mikan, and Hiyoko died not knowing. They had to live on to protect each other, saving one another from the despair Monokuma would try to unleash on them as Peko had saved Fuyuhiko from execution. They had to live on to do the minuscule things, like singing, that Ibuki would want them to enjoy, and they had to live on to honor the memories of their friends that Hiyoko was so hellbent on doing for Mahiru. They had to live on for Mikan, despite the fact she had been driven off of her rocker, for the true Mikan from before — the Mikan who would never condone killing. 

Chiaki was right — they would grow from this and keep her deceased friends in her heart as the rest moved forward with her, to the future that they were robbed of. 

“Thank you, Chiaki,” Sonia says, feeling herself tearing up as she wrapped Chiaki in an embrace. “You have a real knack for those pep talks, you know that?” 

Chiaki pauses before wrapping her own arms around Sonia, returning the hug. “It’s like I was made for it — encouraging others is something I’m good at,” 

Unable to detect the bittersweetness in her tone or see the sad, reminiscent smile on Chiaki’s face, Sonia hugs the girl tighter to further express her gratitude. 

“I didn’t know how much I needed to hear that,” the princess admits. “I am very thankful that it was you I heard it from, Chiaki!”

“Don’t mention it,” Chiaki returns, pulling back from the hug. “I’m going to take a nap, though, now — see you later?”

“See you!” Sonia chirps, feeling much more refreshed. 

As she watched Chiaki’s retreating figure stalk towards her cottage, Sonia finds herself smiling warmly, despite the fact that she only really smiled when others were around to uphold her duty as a princess. Smiling while there was no one to see it was odd, but also weirdly liberating — she didn’t know what feeling was swarming in her stomach and chest, but she decided that as much as it was unfamiliar and weird, she liked it. 

Following Chiaki’s lead, Sonia leaves the hotel, humming on her way to the cottage, thoughts of game consoles and spaceship hair clips occupy her mind, though she’s not too sure why. 

* * *

Sonia was, quite frankly, _proud_ of how not a single thought of murder had spread amongst the group. Exploring the amusement park was much fun — she had never ridden a roller coaster before, but being at the very front cart beside Hajime while she and him shrieked with glee was an unforgettable experience. 

Sonia could even hear Chiaki letting out the occasional yelp from behind her, too. Nekomaru (whose new, robotic form Sonia had admittedly yet to adjust to yet) and Akane’s loud cheers were distinguishable over the loud rush of the wind as it ripped past their ears — Gundham, who was quickly becoming one of Sonia’s dearest friends, was shockingly silent throughout the entire ride, in contrast to Kazuichi, who was shrieking in an eardrum-shattering way. Fuyuhiko, like Chiaki, gave an occasional surprised yell, meanwhile, if Nagito had said anything, Sonia couldn’t hear. 

For once, they felt like normal teenagers at a normal outing, not what their actual reality was — that less than a dozen of their original members were left in the killing game on an abandoned island looked over by a robotic bear with seemingly unlimited control and power. 

However, each ignored this factoid, as the rollercoaster gave more than enough of a distraction. It was exhilarating to Sonia, and some of the most fun she’d had in her life.

Akane must have felt the same way, as she requested to ride again (which Sonia full-heartedly supported), but the rest of the group looked like they would be nauseous. At least, save Nekomaru, who despite not being up for wanting to go again, looked no different than before with his new robotic upgrades. 

Of course, looking back on it, Sonia should have known that that would go to hell at a quick pace, but Sonia was a very good actress when it came to deceiving the truth from herself. 

When trapped in the Funhouse, the hours and minutes bled together in one vast, horrid mess. Sonia had never gone hungry in her life, and she swore to Akane that she would fund for her entire neighborhood’s meals just so that how they would never go through that pain again because, damn, it hurt like a fucking bitch! And Sonia said as much when she felt her stomach practically crumble in on itself from hunger. It was like she, and her stomach specifically, was being impaled by the spears of starvation over and over and over again, except she never got the pleasure of release — of death. Instead, it was like her lifetime was being extended to widen her suffering time.

Had she not been so frail, Sonia had no idea if she’d be able to resist killing, which was immensely hypocritical and terrible but she was in so much _pain_ that her humanity seemed to have left her entirely. 

That was why, when the scraps of Nidai’s body were sprawled on the floor, Sonia couldn’t tell if her tears were those of horror or relief. After being fed by Monokuma (bread had never tasted so fulfilling and wonderful), however, Sonia was able to deduce that her tears were definitely and confidently horrified. 

Horrified that another death had transpired; horrified at how gruesome it was, considering Nekomaru’s head was a foot away from his neck — who was driven mad by their hunger so horrendously so that they stooped to a beheading? — and at the bottom of it all, horrified that _she_ could have been the one to do this had just more time had passed and she was left alone to her thoughts. 

Sonia barely registers the Body Discovery Announcement (she had begun to detest the dings and dongs of the chime) along with Akane’s shriveled cries for her best friend, too lost in her own thoughts to properly think.

* * *

If the third trial had left Sonia numb, then the fourth trial left Sonia fully rattled, both inside and out. 

She tried to will her knees to stop jerking, shaking for reasons she couldn’t tell, and for her hands to stop trembling, but her attempts were futile. She continued trembling like a delicate leaf, long after the great Gundham Tanaka, the Supreme Overlord of Ice himself had tumbled, falling to the ground at the mercy of the animals he had loved so dearly — and now, his Dark Devas of Destruction were entrusted with her, but she knew that it would be in vain because nothing nor no one would be able to come near the Ultimate Breeder. 

The clock in her cottage ticked by for what felt like hours, but Sonia didn’t so much as move to her bed. All she had done was slide on her nightgown, ready to retire for the night, but sleep wouldn’t so much as approach her, she soon discovered. Sonia hadn’t known Gundham for even a good portion of her life, but he had made a lasting impression when he not only welcomed but _reciprocated_ the conversation she’d so desperately wanted with somebody on the occult and her fascination with serial killers. Despite the fact that his appearance and interests were intimidating, Gundham was so patient and kind to her as one of her first friends that her heart ached whenever she thought about him.

Unfortunately, if his execution was not permanently drilled in her mind, then the sight of the Devas curling into her lap and tossing and turning, as if sensing their owner’s disappearance while unconscious, definitely made her remember. 

Briefly, Sonia wondered if the Devas were dreaming of Gundham, before deciding that whatever the answer was that it would make her upset no matter what. Part of her envied their ability to fall asleep, something she craved — the other part of her dreaded when she’d wake up and realize that now, 9 of her friends were dead. 

It was quite funny, Sonia can’t help but think, about how quickly her emotions escalated. Days ago, she was fully confident in her and her friends’ ability to move past the deaths of their late friends and not repeat their mistakes, to nearly starving to death and being blind with desperation, to rapid denial at Gundham’s connection to the crime, and now, the feeling of emptiness after it felt like everything had been hollowed out of her. 

What would her people think of her if they could see her now?

A sharp knock came from the door, (mercifully) stopping that thought from evolving from just a question. 

Gently placing each Deva on the mini-beds she had set up on her nightstand, Sonia rose, rushing to the door. Quickly flinging it open, she motioned the knocker in, quick to seal out any unwanted humidity from creeping inside her cottage that was at a fair and comfortable temperature.

“Hey, Sonia… how are you doing?” Chiaki greets awkwardly, gripping a large basket of hamster assortments and necessities. Hamster food, beds, litter boxes, cages, wheels, toys, and much more were piled in. “I figured you wouldn’t want to go in Gundham’s cottage and collect the Devas’ stuff, so I wanted to bring them to you. Plus, I don’t think you should be alone right now.” 

“That’s very sweet of you,” Sonia says, sniffing slightly — she hadn’t even realized there were tears running down her face during her recollection of her time with Gundham. “What of Akane? Is she doing alright?” 

Chiaki nodded, setting down the hamster items quietly at the foot of Sonia’s bed. “Yeah, alright enough, I guess. I stopped by there before heading to Gundham’s cottage, but she was fast asleep. She had dried tears on her face… I think. I put a thick blanket I found in the back of her closet around her since her room was freezing… I hope she’ll feel better by morning, but if she doesn’t, we’re all here to support her, right?” 

“... Right,” Sonia confirms after a few moments of silence pass. “I am sorry, I am just feeling a bit off right now. These past few days seem to be catching up to me.” 

“Don’t apologize for that,” Chiaki said, furrowing her brow. “You’re human. You have emotions, so don’t be sorry for not being at your best after one of your friends’ death, okay?”

“Okay,” Sonia murmurs. 

The two fall into a comfortable silence before Chiaki reaches over to the hamster items basket, retracting each item one by one. “Here, I’ll help you set up. You can rant, too, if you want. I’m a good listener and good with advice, I think,” 

“You are,” Sonia assures, assisting Chiaki in removing the items. “And… thank you. Friends such as you, Hajime, and Gundham help me know what it is like to be a regular teenager.”

Chiaki smiled her usual, leisured smile. “I’m glad to hear that. Your trust means a lot to me; I’m happy you trust me enough to hear your private thoughts since I know you aren’t very open with them.”

Smiling, Sonia begins to talk. Chiaki listens intently, inputting advice or a question or her own thoughts on something every now and then, all while organizing the communal area for the Devas. Sonia had never been more thankful that it seemed Chiaki was programmed in her DNA to be an active, attentive, and sincere listener and friend. 

When she had finished, Chiaki rested a hand on Sonia’s shoulder. “Gundham and Nekomaru sacrificed themselves to honor the sacrifices our dead friends have made,” Chiaki began. “And now… now they’re a part of the list of friends we need to mourn for and grow for their sake. If Gundham were here, do you think he’d _want_ you to be so upset that you aren’t sleeping? Or so unwell that you aren’t able to live on and be happy like he wished?” 

As soon as she noticed Chiaki wouldn’t move on until Sonia actually answered, the blonde blurted out: “No,”

“But he’d also want you to mourn,” Chiaki explains. “You can’t move on and fully live if you’ve never fully acknowledged what you lost and how it made you feel — don’t you get it? You won’t be able to be at peace with yourself until you’ve allowed yourself to freely cry. So, cry. Cry all you want — you’ll feel better afterward, I think,”

At her words, Sonia couldn’t stop herself from giving in to the temptation of it. Leaping into Chiaki’s open arms, Sonia’s own arms are barely around the good-hearted gamer before her tears are freely spilling down her cheeks, her chest heaving from the ugly sobs that were ricocheting throughout the cottage. 

Sonia genuinely couldn’t remember the last time she had cried like _this,_ much less in someone’s company, but it was both so freeing and awful that it didn’t help how she felt — absolute shit. Crying was the worst, but Chiaki was right; she felt much lighter now, like a burden had been lifted off of her — a burden that her friend had helped lift with her by being there for her. 

“Thank you, Chiaki,” Sonia thanks, attempting to sound dignified, but it was in vain as she hiccupped from her cries. Her eyesight was still blurry from her tears, and she could feel her bottom lip trembling, but for now, her miniature crying session was enough. 

“It’s really no problem,” Chiaki insists. “I can stay for the night if you’d like?” 

“That would be great, Chiaki,” Sonia says, mustering up a smile. 

“I’ll go grab my stuff from my place — I’ll be right back, okay?”

“Okay,” the blonde nodded. “And Chiaki?” 

The mentioned gamer turned around again. “Yeah?”

“I truly cannot thank you enough. So, thank you for helping. You were very insightful!”

Chiaki smiled. “Anything for a friend,”

Once again, Sonia smiles in turn, missing the bittersweetness in Chiaki’s tone. Chiaki turned, leaving for her cottage before Sonia could detect it. 

* * *

Much like the first death (which felt all too long ago), the events of Nagito’s plan had passed by in a whirlwind, leaving Sonia dazed and confused and struggling to keep up with all the turns in the case.

For one, after a long day of searching the islands for bombs, Nagito had sent the remaining survivors ( _six._ The Imposter, Teruteru, Mahiru, Peko, Ibuki, Hiyoko, Mikan, Nekomaru, Gundham, and now Nagito had left their group, leaving only six of them left), on a wild turkey chase (was that the correct term? Sonia couldn’t be sure) to find his location — just to come across his slashed, bloodied body. 

At first, Sonia, like the rest, assumed he had been tortured. Yes, she didn’t like how that would mean another one of the group would end up being executed, but the combination of the terror in Nagito’s glossed-over eyes and the assortment of injuries and gashes on his body practically told the tale itself. 

However, after a long-winded discussion, Chiaki and Hajime had pressed on that it had to be a suicide. Sure, it was unexpected, deliberately much more extra than it had to be, but at the end of the day, it was the truth, right?

_Incorrect_. Hajime and Chiaki continued to run through the case, eventually coming to the conclusion that the kill was caused not by the falling spear penetrating him, but rather poison Nagito inhaled with the help of the fire grenades, tossed by an unaware member of their group. 

Sonia could feel her head pound and her stomach stir, panic settling in. Her peers looked the same, besides Chiaki, who seemed deep in thought. 

All she could comprehend was how _unfair_ it was. Sonia knew plenty about law and government — Nagito’s death would be classified as a suicide in _any_ respectable court, but why, because of a loophole, would one of them be executed? 

* * *

The conversation unfolding in front of Sonia was appalling. 

She could understand that Nagito had targeted the traitor. What she could not understand, however, were the words that fell out of Chiaki’s mouth: 

“I’m the traitor. The agent sent by the Future Foundation to hide among you all… is me.” 

“Hey, Chiaki… are you being serious right now?” Fuyuhiko asked, looking as astounded as Sonia felt. 

“Ch-Chiaki is the traitor?” Sonia can feel her lips moving apart, but she can barely register the words leaving her mouth as she meets Chiaki’s gaze. “That is a lie, right? Surely you must be joking?” 

“I’m sorry, it’s the truth,” Chiaki apologized with a sincere smile on her face — one that used to comfort Sonia, and one that now made the feeling in her chest hurt more. 

“Hey, what’re you saying sorry for?!” Akane asked, looking betrayed at the apology. 

“Wh-What does this mean? You… up ‘till now… you’ve been tricking us?” Kazuichi stammered, looking utterly dejected. Sonia felt the urge to defend the girl. 

“We were not tricked!” She proclaims through the tears leaking out of her eyes. “After all, we have been working together all this time… we have been helping each other all this time…” 

It was a last-ditch effort to convince herself more than anyone else that Chiaki was lying, and they all knew it. 

“Chiaki, being a traitor… being a member of that horrifying Future Foundation…” Sonia trailed off, unable to believe it. “That is obviously a lie!”

The trial room erupts in a series of opinions — Monomi was attempting to persuade the group that the Future Foundation wasn’t what they thought it was while Fuyuhiko was demanding for the animatronic to “shut the fuck up” because they were “talking to Chiaki.”

“If you say you are the traitor, please provide an explanation that will help us understand!” Sonia finds herself pleading. “‘We cannot vote until we are satisfied.’ That is what you said earlier, Chiaki!”

Willingly, Chiaki obliges, asking Hajime to provide an explanation only he could provide. Not as willingly, Hajime does so, pulling out the notebook of Monomi from Monokuma. 

He went on to explain how, since Monomi couldn’t write, the journal would have to be written by someone connected to Monomi — the traitor. Chiaki smiled and nodded encouragingly at his words. 

Sonia found herself agitated by the gesture — why was Chiaki willing to have Hajime explain himself on her behalf? She was fully aware that it would lead to her own execution — why was she just… _accepting,_ no, _pushing_ her fate to that direction? 

“But how would you know who the traitor is from that?” Sonia demands, desperate. 

“Because… there’s an entry written in here that only me and one other person would know,” Hajime explains, looking as pained as Sonia did. 

“There must be some mistake!” Sonia reasons after Hajime’s explanation. “I mean… if Chiaki is the traitor… what was all that time we spent with her?! _Was that all a lie too?!_ ” 

“Chiaki is… she is being controlled by Monokuma. That is why… we should help her…” Sonia continues, desperately wiping away the tears springing up from the corners of her eyes. 

“I-I’m not satisfied either,” Akane admits. “I mean, if you were the traitor, there’s no way you’d do something so stupid when we found the bomb!” 

“Now that you mention it, Chiaki immediately went to the card reader with her handbook…” Fuyuhiko recalled. 

“She tested it out right away after being told it would only react to the traitor’s handbook…” Kazuichi quietly added on. 

“That doesn’t make any sense!” Akane reasons. “A traitor would be more cautious than that!” 

“Chiaki probably knew the bomb was a fake. That’s why she also knew Nagito’s trap was a bluff…” Hajime explains, looking tired. Sonia recognized that look of sadness and defeat in everyone else around her — besides Monokuma, of course.

“Sh-She knew?” Sonia whispers. Louder, she continues. “That is a mistake! That must be a mistake! Why are you saying such things?! Do you really want Chiaki to be the traitor?!” 

“Of course not…” Hajime trails off, looking close to tears as well. 

“I will not believe it! I refuse to believe that Chiaki is the traitor!” The blonde continues. “There is… just no way!”

“But then nobody will be saved!” Hajime counters.

“There is no way Chiaki would have known if that bomb was fake or not!” Sonia exclaims. “The only person who knew it was a fake was me when I tried to detonate it!”

“That’s not it, Sonia shouldn’t have been the only one who knew it was a fake…” Hajime pointed out. He looked as if every word pained him to say. “Monomi was also there when you found out the bomb at the military base wasn’t real… you said so yourself.”

“I-Is that true, Miss Sonia?” Kazuichi stumbles over his words. Sonia felt herself pale at Hajime’s recollection. 

“Chiaki heard about it from Monomi. That’s why she knew the bomb was a fake.” Hajime continues. 

“...Since I’ve been found out, I’ll just confess,” Chiaki says, speaking up. “The reason I couldn’t tell anyone I knew the bomb was a fake was because… if I had said that, I would’ve had to explain how I heard about it from Monomi…”

Chiaki flashed them an apologetic and sheepish grin, and Sonia felt something within her break at the sight of it. 

“ _I do not want to hear that!_ ”

Successfully capturing everyone in the room’s attention, Sonia rapidly blinks away her tears, unconsciously trying to maintain the royal image she had during speeches and debates. However, currently, no one cared much for it. 

“Enough already… please, do not say another word…” Sonia pleaded, her hands trembling. “I do not want this anymore… I am so very tired… of doubting people…” 

“Sonia…” Hajime trails off, searching for the words to comfort her with. 

Chiaki would know the perfect ones. 

“A-And, just because she knew the bomb was a fake does not mean we should decide she is the traitor!” Sonia continues, ignoring Hajime’s interruption. Her efforts to contain her tears were futile as she felt them running down her cheeks —- she was sure she looked like a blubbering, rosy-cheeked mess, but that felt like the least important thing at the moment to Sonia. 

The argument rolled off of Sonia’s tongue hurriedly, but to her dismay, Hajime ended up shooting down every single one of her rebuttals with a pained grimace and pure facts. 

She had never felt more hopeless in her entire life. 

* * *

“Unlike before, you guys don’t have to stay alive by doubting someone… you guys can stay alive by believing in me.” 

“Are you telling us to believe in you… and sacrifice you? That is just too cruel!” Sonia said, sobbing at Chiaki’s remark. 

“I’m sorry,” Chiaki looked down to her feet. She sounded sincere and genuinely meant it, and that crushed Sonia more because why would she ever even _consider_ apologizing when she had been so wonderful and kind to her? 

“It’s voting time,” Chiaki announced, snapping Sonia out of her thoughts. It was amusing how she had a habit of doing so, without even being aware of it. “Believe in me… and cast your vote.”

All Sonia felt as she cast her vote was nothing but pure despair. 

* * *

“Everything… was true?” Sonia mutters to the group as soon as they got their results. 

That meant Chiaki really was the traitor.

That meant that she really had (however accidentally) killed Nagito. 

That meant she was about to be executed, and Sonia and everyone else was powerless to stop it. 

Chiaki, unaware of what was running through Sonia’s mind, continued to talk with the others, and Sonia would occasionally offer her input, but couldn’t bring herself to do much else.

“E-Even if you were a traitor, you never betrayed us.” Sonia found herself saying. “Chiaki, you will always be our friend. Even now… we don’t blame you for this! That’s why you don’t need to apologize!” 

The others agreed, but Sonia still couldn’t bring herself to fully listen, only looking towards Chiaki, even as Monomi attempted to overpower Monokuma in a last-ditch effort to save Chiaki.

Sonia couldn’t blame Monomi — she would do the same if she were strong enough. 

She only began to fully listen once again when Monomi was announced to be executed with Chiaki. Melodramatically, Monomi was given her last wish — to give a speech worthy of a teacher. 

“There’s no need to be a hero; you don’t have to force yourself just to make people acknowledge you. When you do that, you end up blaming yourself, blaming other people, and feeling jealous of everyone — but still, it doesn’t have to be like that. Even if people don’t acknowledge you, you just have to be someone that you can be proud of! ‘Cause you yourself are your biggest supporter! If you can learn to love yourself… that love will continue to support you for the rest of your life.” 

Sonia, nor anyone else, interrupted her, but she couldn’t help but feel her speech was a bit odd. Wouldn’t a speech about not giving up, like Gundham had, fit more accordingly? Or did Monomi know something they didn’t? As if to get an answer, Sonia looked to Chiaki, who always seemed to know everything. The gamer was looking right at the princess but turned away when Sonia met her gaze, her expression unreadable. 

“Love, love!”

_Love… love?_

Just the words made Sonia’s breath hitch. She couldn’t even begin to describe what she was feeling, just that the words had awoken something in her. 

Love? Was that what she felt for Chiaki?

Was this the love Peko felt for Fuyuhiko? Was this the love that her parents had felt for one another? Was this the connection she had craved? 

Or was she just seeing things that weren’t there, now that Chiaki was going to die? 

Her stomach lurched at the thought of that — Chiaki was _moments_ away from her execution, and here Sonia was, just realizing all of this? Not even that, she was _pondering_ it — did she have no respect for her best friend?

“Bye, everyone…” Chiaki somberly said, once again snapping Sonia out of her thoughts. “It’s okay… a shining future will always be waiting for you. It’s true… it’s absolutely true ‘cause I know.”

“Bye-bye! Please don’t forget about your teacher.” Monomi cheerfully said by Chiaki’s side. 

Watching Chiaki wave with a serene smile on her face as she prepared for execution broke Sonia’s heart.

“Then let’s proceed with high spirits!” Monokuma cackled blissfully, milking in their collective sadness with glee. “This is the very last… _punishment tiiiiime!_ ”

“ _WAIT!_ ” Sonia shrieked, not even bothering to hold back the tears cascading down her face at a rapid pace. 

The others joined Sonia’s side, but they should have known it was futile — it always was. 

Monokuma continued laughing his maniacal and haunting laugh as he slammed his gavel down on the red punishment button, summoning Chiaki and Monomi to their death. 

* * *

The punishment was gruesome, that they were all in agreement with. 

(Each one had been.)

Within seconds, the wonderful friend Chiaki had been was reduced to whatever flattened parts of her were underneath the large Tetris blocks. 

Sonia had never crumbled faster than she had then, collapsing to her knees beside Hajime, everyone too speechless to comfort them. 

With a heavy heart, Sonia can’t help but think that Chiaki would know exactly what to say and that she’d never be able to be of help to Sonia again. 

What hurt more was that she had never gotten the chance to say “ _thank you_ ” properly, either.

Right then and there, on the floor of the courtroom as Monokuma continued his sadistic cackles, Sonia came to a decision. This time, there would be no more deaths. This time, she would properly mourn and move on, but certainly not for herself. She’d do so for Chiaki, for Gundham, for Hiyoko, and for the eight other friends they had lost. 

It was not only what they owed to them, but it was what they would want. 

* * *

The real Chiaki Nanami was dead and had been for months and years. The one she had come to know was nothing more than code and an AI. 

Still, despite the fact that it rattled Sonia to her core, she held strong, undeterred even under the gaze of the true Ultimate Despair — it was not only what Chiaki would have wanted, but it was what _Sonia_ herself wanted — she wouldn't allow despair to take away anything more from her ever again, even if it meant an unforeseen future and life in isolation with her fifteen — _fourteen_ — ex-classmates on Jabberwock Island.

* * *

(Sonia was happy to report that her inward promise held true in the end. Eventually, by the time they woke up from their state of comatose, one by one, no one else had died or fell to despair. 

They had loved, they had lost, they had grieved but they had also lived on — and all Sonia could think, with a bittersweet smile, was that Chiaki Nanami would be incredibly proud if she were there with them.) 

**Author's Note:**

> i hate this and the ending of it so much but if we pretend that like 2/3 of this oneshot are nonexistent we'll be all good
> 
> like you can just tell i gave up halfway through,, in my defense doing eighth-grade algebra and physics while writing for femslash february has drained all of my energy to revise this so i'm just posting my first draft because fuck it!! im so sorry soniaki apologists that you had to go through all of that


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